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Parenting is not what you imagined? Here is how you can cope with it.

We all have our thoughts and ideas about parenting before we become one. This is because we have seen other parents, new and old and their style of dealing with kids. But we forget that each child is different and what your friend or sister did for her child, is not going to be the same for you. 

There are times when kids will not behave the way you want. If the child is too small, you will have sleepless nights and as the child grows, you are going to run around shouting about things not to do. You will feel agitated and irritated with the new changes coming your life. So how do you turn your grief into acceptance? 

Photo by William Fortunato on Pexels.com
  1. It’s ok to feel sad and Angry: End of the day, we are humans with limited physical and mental ability to deal with things and we have our moments of meltdown, frustration and anger. This is very normal, and we need to accept it. All you have to do is take it with a pinch of salt. We all don’t have the best day at work, do we? There are days when the boss is annoyed or the work is not done on time, but you come out of it and move on with your work, right? Likewise, in parenting too you must accept it and move on with it. 
  2. Talk it out: The best way to release our frustration is to talk it out. Confide with someone, your spouse, your own mother or a friend who can hear you out without any biased opinion. Talk to them and be honest with your feelings and accept them. This by any means doesn’t make you a bad parent. 
  3. Appreciate yourself: Parenting is one such job where you would hardly find anyone appreciating your work. No matter how good you are, there is always something that is not perfect for someone else. Its time you take the baton in your own hand and appreciate yourself. You know you are doing your best at being the perfect parent that your child deserves and while the world is busy finding faults, you can surely pat your back and appreciate what you have done. Say some kind and good words to yourself that you would have otherwise said to someone else. 
  4. Hug your little one: “Jadu Ki Jappi”, yes, that magical hug can do wonders for you. When you feel you can’t take it any more or are completely drained, simply hug your child and let the hearts do the talking. Trust me this works like magic as this comes from my personal experience. Your child can understand when you are feeling low, and they will show you the compassion that you may be seeking from someone else. 
  5. Break time: No one can work 24*7 and we also know that parenting works around the clock. There are no brakes. You can be called on duty anytime of the day or night and its always and emergency. But we are humans and our body and mind need time off too. Take breaks- short or big. Ask your partner to take over, and you can either go for a coffee date with your friends, go shopping or simply binge watch Netflix and chill. Any why just short breaks. Take a long break too. Go out of town or a vacation with friends, go for a staycation and detox your mind and relax while swimming in the pool. And if you have a family member who can take care of the child over the weekend, you and your partner can have a romantic break and rejuvenate and rekindle the love that was lost in-between the parenting duties.  
Photo by Josh Willink on Pexels.com

Parenting is a completely imperfect world. No one is right and no one is wrong. Everyone has their own situation. It can be overbearing for someone who is doing it all alone and a cakewalk for someone who has an army of staff managing things for them. Don’t be your own judge neither allow anyone else to judge you. You know the best for your child and what’s good for you too. So, treat yourself for being the best parent that you are and raise a toast to yourself.  

Also read my blog on How to help kids deal with Stress here.

This blog is a part of Blogchatter’s #halfmarathon

By mummatalks

Mom of two brats, use to work as an analyst now a SAHM. Love books.

26 replies on “Parenting is not what you imagined? Here is how you can cope with it.”

‘ Parenting is a completely imperfect world. ’- this is the gist of parenting. We unnecessarily try to be a perfect one. Parenting is more about our instincts, responsiveness, and handling at certain moment, in certain circumstances.

Yes parenting is most beautiful but equally challenging journey and it is true that we parents are also normal human being with limited physical and mental capacity. it is perfectly ok to be not ok certain days. at the end. it is love and care that makes a beautiful family rather than being perfect at all tasks.

Parenting is a beautiful and never ending role we as a parent plays and so happy that you have spoken about how even parents walk through tough time. Really lovely post.

True, parenting is not easy, the world is ready to point out our shortcomings, but we can appreciate ourselves only by patting our backs. I love your break time tips. Sometimes I bring these little breaks into my life and they really make themselves happy.

There is nothing called as perfect parenting. Everyone tries their best and do what is best for their kids. Do take a chill pill and enjoy the process. Find time for yourself because if you are happy you can make others happy.

This is so true , sometimes we feel so pissed off and frustrated. And sometimes we get upset when kids don’t do the things which we want or don’t listen to us.
We started judging ourselves that are we doing good parenting. That is the time when we need a break. And I do all the things which you have mentioned above. Parenting doesn’t mean to be a perfect one because ” perfection ” word don’t exist when it comes to parenting

Parenting is beautiful yet some find it stressful and taxing. Being parents is a full-time responsibility and the sooner you realize it, the better. A lot of young parents find it overwhelming to deal with the pressures of parenting. I always tell them to take one day at a time and go easy on themselves and to their children.

Parenting is not always a bed of roses. It has its pains and tribulations, but it is a beautiful journey that teaches you the lessons of life. Very insightful post.

Loved your balanced take on parenting in this post. It can be lonely journey and it always helps to have someone share your experiences and offer you advice as well as a shoulder when needed.

Parenting, no doubt is a beautiful experience but it is a fact that it is burdening too. Sometimes it becomes really difficult to cope up with the stress involved in it. This is a very useful article.

Parenting can be a little tough especially for parents who have hyper energetic kids. But accepting the difficulty level and working towards solutions can be make things really easy. Thanks for the tips you shared. I am going to practice it.

As parents, we often tend to burn ourselves out a lot and beat ourselves mentally for our shortcomings and failures. I have been through my lows and at times I feel this is not what I got myself into. but then later I try my level best to cope with it by talking out with my best friend.

Its okay to be imperfect because there is no perfect parenting. I had no idea how to cope up with it, but then I thought this is something i cannot fail in. So far the journey is great.

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